oh dear Suzie girl....

Hi everyone...

Once again, I am talking to myself..but this time for the whole wide world to see. Or read, as the case may be. I am writing to myself. For myself. For my own entertainment. So when I realize my goal, I can come back and look and say "Damn girl, you did it!!"

I don't mind if you read here, too. Maybe you'll learn something about me. I'm just an ordinary person. With an ordinary life. In fact, the things I go through probably repeat themselves in 1,000's of households all over our US of A. I am a statistic. How so? Well, I am one of the bazillion people in the US who is overweight. Shocking, I Know. This society of me, me, me has led us to be People of Chunk. Myself included. from CDCP: Percent of noninstitutionalized adults age 20 years and over who are overweight or obese: 66% (Source: NHANES data on the Prevalence of Overweight and Obesity Among Adults-United States, 2003-2004)

How much chunk? That is the million dollar question. (ADD moment: I wish someone would say me a million dollar to be SUPER healthy. I totally would do it!)

How much do I weigh? I hate this question. I have avoided it as slong as I have avoided the fact that pants are too tight. Shit, I don't want to answer, but Suzie girl, we gotta face facts. It al started when I saw a video of myself. Crap, did I look fat? I did. And video does not lie. The first thing I thought is,"No wonder my husband's sex drive plummeted. He has to screw THAT?"

(I warned ya...very personal stuff here...)

So I decided we'll go on a diet. He agreed to do it with me. But he's a man and can fart and lose 3#. Women, we have hormones and stuff and more hormones. So it takes us longer and it's harder. But we're doing this together, he and I. Let me tell ya: my husband is every bit of the hottest man you've ever seen. He really is. He is tall, broad shoulder and oh my, he's just yummy. Luckily, he's about the only thing I can eat and not gain weight.

Anyhow, I weighed myself. On the first day of my period. When all I can think of is Dairy Queen, crunchy chips, cheeseburgers and anything deep fat fried. What the hell was I thinking? A diet on Day 1? INSANE. But I did it. I weighed myself.

a whopping 168. (I should also mention that I am 5'3" in height....) At this weight, I look short and wide. If I were a storage container, those would be great stats. But I am a reasonably attractive, mostly healthy 40 year old WOMAN. My BMI is teetering. I am a 29 right now...and that's all I can think about. Even more so that Cheetoes. You wanna know YOUR BMI? Go here: Calculate your BMI - Standard BMI Calculator

What diet did I choose? ....The Fat Flush Plan For Accelerated Weight Loss.....and it's TOUGH. Well, that's a lie. I just don't want to DO IT. But it worked last time (until me and the Sexy Man gave up, and I put on EVERY stinking pound again...)

So I am proud to say, Suzie Girl, that we have survived Week 1 of the Diet. I am down 4.8#, can I just round up and say 5#? My mind just works better with whole numbers. Week one is hard on me...It's actually PHASE 1...I call it hell. Phase 1 is the 'toughest' stage of the program and has been labled 'bootcamp'. It is first and foremost a cleansing program to facilitate weight loss by giving the liver support and nourishment. It basically means I give up most food that has taste and end up so freakin' hungry that ANYTHING would taste good....

But I wanna be healthy, right?

My goal weight is 135. I am 30# away from that. I look at that and say, "Shit, I am NEVER gonna make it." But I can think that, or look at these 5 pounds, and say "You rock, Momma! You're off to a great start!" (I tend to be negative and then go eat a pie...)

So Suzie, here we go. Onto healthiness and eventual hotness.
Whatever way this goes, you gotta love yourself. Love ya, Suzie.....

(personal note: photos used in blog posts ARE NOT ACTUALLY ME. They are stock photos. I have to anonymous and all myserious-like. My kids are techno-nerds and I don't want them to find me online....)